You forgot Dick. He's like everyone's fucking mother. Such a dick. [His look turns into an amused one] Yeah, he's straight, but sometimes its all the same in the dark. Didn't think you'd lower yourself to the likes of me and my pack, no. [He rolls his eyes] That was my entire point, dipwad.
Uh... whoops multiplied by two? And just for the record, I didn't beg you. And I got stuck between your headspace to save your damn ass, so that doesn't even count.
Then that makes me your daddy. [His smirk grows even wider with that.] Well, there you go. Nothing's going to happen and I don't do situational crap. [He snorts.] And maybe I'm just giving you stories so that you're not an obnoxious shit.
[he makes a puking sound] I'm not here to fill some weird kink of yours, Parrish. [He laughs, letting his head fall back] Right, right. You like to stick with the same pizza. And I know you're not feeding me stories, man. You're not creative enough to come up with swinging dick.
I did not! How the fuck do you figure? [Yeah, he figures he probably did, cause that's kind of his thing, but it was so long ago and he was high]
Are you sure? I'm positive you'd make the perfect little boy. [Though even saying it makes Adam's eye twitch.] Are you sure about that? You guys seem convinced I have no clue what sex is.
I figure because it happened. You tried bribing me with money and college tuition to keep from going to the hospital.
Fucking gross, you shit. Get your gross kinks away from me. [He pushes at Adam] Nah, I know you know what it is. But having one dick in your mouth once doesn't make you an expert.
[He laughs, because its vaguely coming back to him] And if you would've taken it, you could be partying instead. What was it up to, a hundred thousand?
Don't fucking call me that! [He grabs Adam's arm and pushes at his face] Well, you were always the type to be all... 'Oooh, nooo, I have to love you before you stick your dick in me. We have to go on a hundred dates so I can see if your personality matches my soul'
Please, that's the day you knew you couldn't live without me.
Does Joey Bear need a snack? [He starts laughing while smacking back with his free hand.] No, I never said I had to be in love. All I said was that I wanted to actually know who I was going to be doing it with.
That's what I like to hear, Joeypie. [Adam yelps and grabs his leg in an attempt to make Kavinsky fall over.] Well enough! Better than a lot of people you've been with!
[Adam just blinks because he still remembers it clearly.] I got a headache from dealing with an idiot kid who broke his ribs in a wreck and probably got lost heading to his own room, bribed to get out of Henrietta, and then had a car I didn't ask for forced on me. That night we probably had a better understanding of each other, but in no way was that a fun night, dude.
Yeah you just wait, it'll be a big snack, too. [He hops around, holding on to Adam's arm, still trying to kick at him] But I never claimed any different!
[He snorts, rolling his eyes] Whatever, man. It was fun for me. What would you have done instead? Sat at home and watered your plants?
[Adam yelps as they lose balance and fall over, but he's quick to recover, already trying to pull him into a headlock.] My point was I knew him well enough!
I'll put a whole shit ton of other embarrassing crap on there too, don't worry.
Your day will come. Until then, you'll just have to suffer through your lame existence. You've already blown up a car, taken a bunch of pills, smashed a whole lot of expensive vodka against a house. You're in stage one.
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timeasmymeasure
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Date: 2015-05-24 10:09 am (UTC)Uh... whoops multiplied by two? And just for the record, I didn't beg you. And I got stuck between your headspace to save your damn ass, so that doesn't even count.
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Date: 2015-05-24 10:40 am (UTC)You were trying to bribe me. Repeatedly.
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Date: 2015-05-24 10:50 am (UTC)I did not! How the fuck do you figure? [Yeah, he figures he probably did, cause that's kind of his thing, but it was so long ago and he was high]
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Date: 2015-05-24 11:00 am (UTC)I figure because it happened. You tried bribing me with money and college tuition to keep from going to the hospital.
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Date: 2015-05-24 11:05 am (UTC)[He laughs, because its vaguely coming back to him] And if you would've taken it, you could be partying instead. What was it up to, a hundred thousand?
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Date: 2015-05-24 11:09 am (UTC)Something like that. That whole night was beyond ridiculous.
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Date: 2015-05-24 07:47 pm (UTC)Please, that's the day you knew you couldn't live without me.
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Date: 2015-05-24 07:53 pm (UTC)I wanted to strangle you that whole night, K.
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Date: 2015-05-24 08:18 pm (UTC)You did not! You had fun. When did you ever get to do that before? And you got a fucking car out of it!
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Date: 2015-05-24 08:26 pm (UTC)[Adam just blinks because he still remembers it clearly.] I got a headache from dealing with an idiot kid who broke his ribs in a wreck and probably got lost heading to his own room, bribed to get out of Henrietta, and then had a car I didn't ask for forced on me. That night we probably had a better understanding of each other, but in no way was that a fun night, dude.
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Date: 2015-05-24 08:35 pm (UTC)[He snorts, rolling his eyes] Whatever, man. It was fun for me. What would you have done instead? Sat at home and watered your plants?
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Date: 2015-05-24 09:27 pm (UTC)Probably. Or maybe I would have caught up on my sleep which I so desperately needed.
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Date: 2015-05-24 09:38 pm (UTC)My company is better than sleep, believe me.
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Date: 2015-05-24 09:52 pm (UTC)Yeah, no. Sleep would have been much preferred.
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Date: 2015-05-24 11:08 pm (UTC)I'm offended. That was like, the fucking cornerstone of our friendship.
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Date: 2015-05-24 11:49 pm (UTC)That was when I found out that there might actually be something that isn't a total shitbag somewhere in there.
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Date: 2015-05-24 11:58 pm (UTC)Ninety percent shitbag, don't let anything fool you.
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Date: 2015-05-25 12:09 am (UTC)I didn't say you weren't a shitbag. Just not a complete one.
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Date: 2015-05-25 12:18 am (UTC)Yeah, and I'm rubbing off on you, shitnuts.
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Date: 2015-05-26 05:31 am (UTC)I hope not.
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Date: 2015-05-26 05:47 am (UTC)See, that was a dick thing to say. Proof.
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Date: 2015-05-26 05:54 am (UTC)On top of all the dick things you've said, I think that rates about a two in our collective emotional abuse.
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Date: 2015-05-26 06:01 am (UTC)Well, you're still learning. You're the ugly duckling.
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Date: 2015-05-26 08:06 am (UTC)And one day I'll be a shitbag swan. Just like you.
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Date: 2015-05-26 08:13 am (UTC)Your day will come. Until then, you'll just have to suffer through your lame existence. You've already blown up a car, taken a bunch of pills, smashed a whole lot of expensive vodka against a house. You're in stage one.
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